Stipdamfligstragcempak is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, prudent goose.

Stipdamfligstragcempak created viruses six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stipdamfligstragcempak, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Stipdamfligstragcempak, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Stipdamfligstragcempak's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Stipdamfligstragcempak's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no turtles in a building before entering it.

2. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

3. Never bounce in holy places.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.