Getflamgam is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, merciless squirrel.

Getflamgam created humanity six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Getflamgam, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Getflamgam, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Getflamgam's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Getflamgam's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sheep.

2. Hide if four tapirs approach from the west.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate frogs.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.