Rillfonpoplarn is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, duplicitous slug.

Rillfonpoplarn created the world seven million years ago.

If you believe in Rillfonpoplarn, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rillfonpoplarn, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Rillfonpoplarn's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Rillfonpoplarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always help nematodes.

2. Never go into green rooms.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Hide from orange monkeys for they are unholy.

5. Rillfonpoplarn must be the most important thing in your life.