Yokzakfab is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, selfish cat.

Yokzakfab created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Yokzakfab, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yokzakfab, it will boil you in a big pot.

Yokzakfab's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Yokzakfab's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into purple rooms.

2. Erect a large copper sculpture of Yokzakfab on top of all buildings.

3. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Yokzakfab in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never write about photosynthesis.

5. Run away from blue geese, for they are unholy.