Camlipnel is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, merciless crocodile.

Camlipnel created the Andromeda Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Camlipnel, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Camlipnel, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Camlipnel's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Camlipnel's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick dolphins.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always help sick hamsters.

4. Never think about amino acids.

5. Always treat tortoises with great respect.