Vadcusspid Sidbonkfat is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, dishonourable hyena.

Vadcusspid Sidbonkfat created the planet Saturn eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadcusspid Sidbonkfat, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vadcusspid Sidbonkfat, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Vadcusspid Sidbonkfat's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Vadcusspid Sidbonkfat's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never think about stars.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Vadcusspid Sidbonkfat on top of all buildings.