Armbossgod is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, weak spider.

Armbossgod created life seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Armbossgod, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Armbossgod, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Armbossgod's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Armbossgod's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat cucumbers.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Put Armbossgod first in all things.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never pour water over plants.