Vogtagbet is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, bad-tempered narwhal.

Vogtagbet created time and space six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vogtagbet, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Vogtagbet, it will turn you into a mouse.

Vogtagbet's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Vogtagbet's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat garlic.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Erect a large iron sculpture of Vogtagbet on top of all buildings.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always treat squirrels with great respect.