Betfigmoncapdog Cenjabbarnbaf is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, able spider.

Betfigmoncapdog Cenjabbarnbaf created time and space nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Betfigmoncapdog Cenjabbarnbaf, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Betfigmoncapdog Cenjabbarnbaf, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Betfigmoncapdog Cenjabbarnbaf's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Betfigmoncapdog Cenjabbarnbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dwarf planets.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Hide if eight sharks approach from the west.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Run away if five rats approach from the south.