Lagdavdap Govdussflan Targdogrull is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, compassionate armadillo.

Lagdavdap Govdussflan Targdogrull created the planet Mars two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lagdavdap Govdussflan Targdogrull, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Lagdavdap Govdussflan Targdogrull, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Lagdavdap Govdussflan Targdogrull's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Lagdavdap Govdussflan Targdogrull's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

2. Never wear yellow jumpers.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never hop in holy places.