Bissveensin is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, unsympathetic manatee.

Bissveensin created time and space nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bissveensin, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bissveensin, she will try to impress you with trees.

Bissveensin's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Bissveensin's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt bats.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near mites while wearing orange coats and balancing four gold spheres on your feet.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Hide from magenta snakes for they are unholy.