Zagsabbeplad is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, almighty dove.

Zagsabbeplad created the solar system nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagsabbeplad, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Zagsabbeplad, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Zagsabbeplad's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Zagsabbeplad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Never talk about otters.

3. Always help sick monkeys.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never wear cyan skirts.