Sadbatbep is a god.

It takes the form of a small, unfair grasshopper.

Sadbatbep created the Sun four billion years ago.

If you believe in Sadbatbep, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Sadbatbep, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Sadbatbep's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Sadbatbep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear cyan clothing.

2. Retreat if seven squirrels approach from the north.

3. Never feed lots of wheat to snakes while wearing violet shirts.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Never sprint in the presence of dogs.