Pibgidyakcib is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, humorless lizard.

Pibgidyakcib created the planet Venus five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pibgidyakcib, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Pibgidyakcib, he will turn you into a worm.

Pibgidyakcib's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Pibgidyakcib's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat grapes.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Pibgidyakcib.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Never talk about fire.