Manratmif is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, fussy octopus.

Manratmif created bats three billion years ago.

If you believe in Manratmif, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Manratmif, he will be very sad.

Manratmif's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Manratmif's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always obey Manratmif's priests.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. You must love Manratmif.