Raktoffiddadhimjam is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, witty rat.

Raktoffiddadhimjam created carbon nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Raktoffiddadhimjam, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Raktoffiddadhimjam, it will turn you into a tree.

Raktoffiddadhimjam's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Raktoffiddadhimjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your feet.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never run in holy places.

5. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a room before entering it.