Vagruttmapflisdossyattnullam is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, pitiless guinea pig.

Vagruttmapflisdossyattnullam created parasitic wasps five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vagruttmapflisdossyattnullam, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Vagruttmapflisdossyattnullam, she will destroy your favourite star.

Vagruttmapflisdossyattnullam's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Vagruttmapflisdossyattnullam's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Vagruttmapflisdossyattnullam loves otters, so they must be respected.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dogs.

5. Do not speak about coconuts.