Yatvanomin is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, selfish dragonfly.

Yatvanomin created a Higgs boson four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yatvanomin, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yatvanomin, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Yatvanomin's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Yatvanomin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven copper sculptures of Yatvanomin on top of important buildings.

2. Erect a large tin sculpture of Yatvanomin on top of all buildings.

3. Never think about chlorophyll.

4. Yatvanomin loves swans, so they must be honoured.

5. Never eat pineapples.