Ratyartveenlakomtgenyat Hasmabmadbisspad is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, unfair badger.

Ratyartveenlakomtgenyat Hasmabmadbisspad created humanity four billion years ago.

If you believe in Ratyartveenlakomtgenyat Hasmabmadbisspad, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Ratyartveenlakomtgenyat Hasmabmadbisspad, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Ratyartveenlakomtgenyat Hasmabmadbisspad's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Ratyartveenlakomtgenyat Hasmabmadbisspad's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never go into orange rooms.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not shave your legs.