Jablingem is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, uncaring swallow.

Jablingem created energy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jablingem, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Jablingem, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Jablingem's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Jablingem's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Jablingem nine times a day.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Do not wear copper on your body.

4. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Jablingem on top of all buildings.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.