Xencebgess is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, calm walrus.

Xencebgess created a top quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Xencebgess, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Xencebgess, it will manifest in front of you.

Xencebgess' most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Xencebgess' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never think ill of sick porpoises.

3. Never eat peas.

4. Do not dye your hair orange.

5. Run away if four capybaras approach from the north.