Botflabquatpas Ponveenbim is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, irritating clam.

Botflabquatpas Ponveenbim created the planet Earth seven million years ago.

If you believe in Botflabquatpas Ponveenbim, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Botflabquatpas Ponveenbim, it will refuse to believe in you.

Botflabquatpas Ponveenbim's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Botflabquatpas Ponveenbim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Hide if six birds approach from the west.

3. Never hurt dolphins.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.