Titsigtarggab is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, merciless mink.

Titsigtarggab created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Titsigtarggab, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Titsigtarggab, she will not invite you to parties.

Titsigtarggab's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Titsigtarggab's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large tin sculpture of Titsigtarggab on top of all buildings.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Titsigtarggab must be the most important thing in your life.