Foblapquag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, benevolent bird.

Foblapquag created Mount Everest seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Foblapquag, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Foblapquag, she will turn you into a duck.

Foblapquag's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Foblapquag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never think about chlorophyll.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never write about black holes.