Cussbogtik is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, unthinking spider.

Cussbogtik created matter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cussbogtik, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cussbogtik, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Cussbogtik's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Cussbogtik's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat bananas.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate swans.

3. Do not hurt pigs.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cussbogtik.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.