Tailfarnbarn is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, confident camel.

Tailfarnbarn created snails six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailfarnbarn, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Tailfarnbarn, she will turn you into a worm.

Tailfarnbarn's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Tailfarnbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from magenta monkeys for they are unholy.

2. Squirrels are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always look after injured porpoises.

5. Do not skip in public.