Gambutbidyak is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, deceitful toad.

Gambutbidyak created silver six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gambutbidyak, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gambutbidyak, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Gambutbidyak's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Gambutbidyak's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

4. Never feed cherries to mites while wearing magenta kilts.

5. Erect a large gold sculpture of Gambutbidyak on top of all buildings.