Gar is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, impressive deer.

Gar created humankind five million years ago.

If you believe in Gar, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gar, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Gar's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Gar's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gar.

4. Do not run in public.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.