Vedtommig is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, uncaring hyena.

Vedtommig created the planet Earth six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vedtommig, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Vedtommig, it will make you grow a tail.

Vedtommig's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Vedtommig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate capybaras.

2. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Never mention voles.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.