Tamfarnrig is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, capable newt.

Tamfarnrig created gold seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tamfarnrig, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Tamfarnrig, he will turn you into a puffin.

Tamfarnrig's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Tamfarnrig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not keep eight tapirs in a large pit.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.