Jat Cenyokvaddingamponcissbop is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, unfair narwhal.

Jat Cenyokvaddingamponcissbop created an up quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jat Cenyokvaddingamponcissbop, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Jat Cenyokvaddingamponcissbop, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Jat Cenyokvaddingamponcissbop's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Jat Cenyokvaddingamponcissbop's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

2. Never laugh in the presence of swans.

3. You must love Jat Cenyokvaddingamponcissbop.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Learn four new languages a year.