Wipfagpark is a god.

It takes the form of a large, pitiless pigeon.

Wipfagpark created the Sun nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wipfagpark, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Wipfagpark, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Wipfagpark's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Wipfagpark's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat limes.

2. Always make sure there are no cats in a building before entering it.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wipfagpark.

5. Wipfagpark must be the most important thing in your life.