Witvonkhog is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, bad-tempered owl.

Witvonkhog created the planet Jupiter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Witvonkhog, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Witvonkhog, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Witvonkhog's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Witvonkhog's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Never run in the presence of swans.

3. Never talk about frogs.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.