Carhimnarlkadkim is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, self-assured yak.

Carhimnarlkadkim created gold eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Carhimnarlkadkim, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Carhimnarlkadkim, she will be very sad.

Carhimnarlkadkim's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Carhimnarlkadkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics near pigs while wearing mauve shoes and balancing five nickel spheres on your feet.

2. Retreat if six nematodes approach from the west.

3. Do not wear silicon on your body.

4. Never think about quantum gravity near cats while wearing cyan shorts and balancing three iron spheres on your neck.

5. Capybaras are not to be trusted.