Wadmumlim is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, clever lobster.

Wadmumlim created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wadmumlim, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Wadmumlim, it will throw large rocks at you.

Wadmumlim's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Wadmumlim's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit near foxes.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not keep seven monkeys in a large pit.