Tamkikcen is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, merciless lizard.

Tamkikcen created bats three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tamkikcen, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tamkikcen, he will turn you into a worm.

Tamkikcen's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Tamkikcen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt mites.

2. Do not take Tamkikcen's name in vain.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not jump in public.