Quafzod is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, emotional centaur.

Quafzod created dark energy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quafzod, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Quafzod, she will refuse to believe in you.

Quafzod's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Quafzod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.