Sidcebhim is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, self-assured swallow.

Sidcebhim created the planet Saturn six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sidcebhim, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Sidcebhim, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Sidcebhim's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Sidcebhim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Do not kill swans.