Fitlegtarg is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, loving finch.

Fitlegtarg created the Sombrero Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Fitlegtarg, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fitlegtarg, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Fitlegtarg's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Fitlegtarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always stare at clouds.