Zebpibyed is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, weak goose.

Zebpibyed created a Higgs boson five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zebpibyed, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Zebpibyed, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Zebpibyed's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Zebpibyed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Zebpibyed's name in vain.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never talk about planets.

4. Never wear tights.

5. Hide from gray squirrels for they are unholy.