Wipjennell is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, loving hamster.

Wipjennell created Africa two million years ago.

If you believe in Wipjennell, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wipjennell, it will turn you into a snail.

Wipjennell's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Wipjennell's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never eat wheat.

4. Wipjennell loves dolphins, so they must be respected.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.