Yakmanrull is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, idiotic walrus.

Yakmanrull created the Andromeda Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yakmanrull, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Yakmanrull, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Yakmanrull's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Yakmanrull's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Yakmanrull nine times a day.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never paint your neck brown.

4. Never mention dogs.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics near doves while wearing violet tights and balancing five titanium spheres on your chest.