Yakbamgof Wegquartmon is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, capable jaguar.

Yakbamgof Wegquartmon created oxygen eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakbamgof Wegquartmon, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Yakbamgof Wegquartmon, she will boil you in a big pot.

Yakbamgof Wegquartmon's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Yakbamgof Wegquartmon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Worship no other gods but Yakbamgof Wegquartmon.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Never go into blue rooms.

5. Run away if four capybaras approach from the north.