Batmilaf is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, self-confident centaur.

Batmilaf created a top quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Batmilaf, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Batmilaf, he will strike you with lightening.

Batmilaf's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Batmilaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics near moths while wearing green ear rings and balancing seven silver spheres on your feet.

2. Do not wear mauve clothing.

3. Never wear orange skirts.

4. Never think about asteroids.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.