Pognellfun is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, amazing bird.

Pognellfun created light seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pognellfun, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Pognellfun, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Pognellfun's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Pognellfun's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Pognellfun eight times a day.

2. Always help porpoises.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.