Pitxinortyarlpakwatdosszan is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, fussy pig.

Pitxinortyarlpakwatdosszan created the planet Venus two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitxinortyarlpakwatdosszan, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Pitxinortyarlpakwatdosszan, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Pitxinortyarlpakwatdosszan's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Pitxinortyarlpakwatdosszan's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Pitxinortyarlpakwatdosszan loves dogs, so they must be respected.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not wear copper on your body.

5. Always take life seriously.