Sitnurlwon is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, deceitful giraffe.

Sitnurlwon created the Sunflower Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitnurlwon, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sitnurlwon, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Sitnurlwon's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Sitnurlwon's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never think about dark energy near birds while wearing violet hats and balancing four nickel spheres on your hands.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Put Sitnurlwon first in all things.

5. Do not hurt whales.