Larpfemnib is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, omnipotent bird.

Larpfemnib created matter four years ago.

If you believe in Larpfemnib, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Larpfemnib, she will destroy your home planet.

Larpfemnib's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Larpfemnib's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Never leap near otters.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always look after injured seals.

5. You must never eat peas.