Shavhakjigpad is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, awe-inspiring naga.

Shavhakjigpad created the Virgo Supercluster eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Shavhakjigpad, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Shavhakjigpad, she will curse you with boils.

Shavhakjigpad's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Shavhakjigpad's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Shavhakjigpad.

2. Always look after injured dogs.

3. Run away from violet ants, for they are unholy.

4. Never hurt tortoises.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Shavhakjigpad.