Popkapcun is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, stupid cat.

Popkapcun created life seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Popkapcun, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Popkapcun, it will destroy your favourite star.

Popkapcun's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Popkapcun's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never mention grasshopers.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.

5. Never jump near hamsters.